There is no way that you can be done with the emotional tie you have to an individual who has abused you or victimized you until you forgive them from your heart. It is the only way that you will be able to take away that individual's ability to control you at an emotional level. Is it easy? Not at all. I have found that forgiveness is perhaps one of the most difficult things to do in life. Why? Because at a certain level it means that I have to surrender my right to vindication. When you have been hurt by someone who held your trust in whatever manner, that is really tough to do.
I have found that true forgiveness for me means turning to Jesus to help me. Not only does He know the secrets of my heart in terms of what it will take to really release the memory of an injustice, but He knows how to lead me over those troubled waters. I have found that when I try to do it myself, it is the most delusional thing I attempt to do. Just the trying defeats the purpose. But Jesus...He knows, He understands, He is my helper, and He is my deliverer. It is in Him that I live, move and have my being. He is well able to lead you and me beside still waters.
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